People get divorced for many reasons, but should Alzheimer’s be one of them?
Conservative Christian minister Pat Robertson stirred up a minor scandal recently when he advised a caller to his television program “The 700 Club” that divorce would be okay if a spouse is in the final stages of Alzheimer’s. His view prompted much speculation and debate among family law practitioners, relationship experts and medical ethicists, which indicates that our society has yet to build consensus on how to treat those who have Alzheimer’s or other causes of mental decline.
Specifically, Robertson told the caller that the caller’s friend “should divorce (his wife) and start all over again, but…make sure she has custodial care, somebody looking after her.” He rationalized his decision by saying that marriage vows are dissoluble by death and that Alzheimer’s is “a kind of death,” since it marks the end of the person known to others and the start of someone with a new personality and diminished memories of the past.
Since many conservative Christians consider marriage to be the foundation of moral structure, other conservative Christian leaders reacted with surprised to Robertson’s apparent endorsement of divorce. One medical ethicist said Robertson’s view on the matter gives permission for the caregiver to move on, but does not take into consideration the patient.
On the other hand, other people have said they feel that a patient in the advanced stages of mental decline is not the same person who was healthy, so the bond created in marriage is dissolved by the person’s transformation. Former Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O’Connor, for example, has said that she was not hurt when her husband, who had severe Alzheimer’s, fell in love with a woman at his care facility. She said the disease had taken away his memories and erased his feelings her, it was okay for him to develop feelings for someone else.
This could be one of those situations for which, at present, there is no correct answer. What are your thoughts? Is Alzheimer’s an acceptable reason to seek divorce?
Source: The New York Times, “Pat Robertson’s remarks on Alzheimer’s stir passions,” Erik Eckholm, Sept. 16, 2011.
